A Soul Destroying 9 to 5 Job
Readers of this blog know me as JT Styles; a 26 year-old dating blogger from New York City.
I love women. I also love blogging about my adventures with women, and inspiring guys to reach greater levels of success in their own dating lives.
However, I am not a full-time dating coach. This means that like most people, I work a 9 to 5 job to support myself.
9 to 5 on Monday through Friday, I wake up, suit up and take on my role as a Middle Manager. The job isn’t that stressful, I like the people I work with, the pay is okay…but office life feels like a ball and chain prison.
You, the reader, might be thinking…
“You should be thankful you have a job…especially IN THIS ECONOMY”.
Yes, I am thankful that having a job helps pay the bills, and what’s leftover is used for leisure.
However, doing a 9 to 5 job for the next 40 years of my life is not what I ultimately want. I don’t want to experience the fear of losing my job each time there are even hints of a recession, cutbacks, or outsourcing.
When I was in between jobs (read: unemployed), I was going out 4 nights a week, constantly meeting and hooking up with women. There was no asshat boss to answer to…no human resource cunt to worry about…no staring at an Excel spreadsheet hitting copy & paste…no deadlines or urgent emails…no annoying phonecalls….no hour long commutes on a packed LIRR train.
Going back to the 9 to 5 grind after this hiatus conflicted with the person I was growing into. My adventures going out to meet and hook up with women were relegated to a something of a weekend warrior activity.
After the excitement of the new job wore off, my overall confidence seemed to be decaying too. I’d feel like a king on weekends, but a peasant on weekdays. It wasn’t that long til I reverted back to the behavior of a mindless 9 to 5 drone, his soul destroyed into a abyss of quick-sand.
The boredom of work and lack of real purpose wasn’t congruent to what I truely valued.
I value financial independence, freedom to do what I want and when I want, and making my own fate. I know a 9 to 5 will never provide this for me.
My friends and family will say, “in this economy” this and that. I’ve made a decision though.
At the end of this month I will be handing in a two week notice to my employer. The decision to leave my current 9 to 5 is something I’ve thought about for over a year. This wasn’t a decision made on a whim or by my emotions. I need to take a step back and refocus my energy; to recharge my soul.
I may look for another job elsewhere, I may not. I may go back to school, I may not.
I don’t know what I’ll be doing yet. I only see a 9 to 5 job as a means to an end. That end is building the life I DESIRE.
What I do know is that the uncertainty excites me; my thoughts have been racing with business ideas I’ve wanted to get off the ground for awhile now.
For every Tim Ferris that has succeeded in lifestyle design, I know there are a millions of others that have failed.
I know my talents. I know there’s passion to make it happen.
Let’s see where this goes…
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The want to break the 9-5 shackles is probably the strongest message that the other manosphere bloggers have instilled in me. More so then dealing with women, my own health, and whatever else. I now have a deep seated desire to be in a position where working isn’t the end game and retirement isn’t in my future. I’d rather live freely like a hobo then be crucified to a “career” for the rest of my days.
Good luck, man.
Definitely can relate ever since college ended. All the time for partying, and then, not so much. Bigtime game changer
Damn dude, big move! Best of luck. I know you have the guts to make it work, but prepare to endure a longggggggg period of uncertainty, doubt, and second-guessing yourself. Just like working on your dating life, working on your financial independence definitely has its “pain period.”
Hit me up if you need anything!
I really dont think lifestyle design is as hard as most make it out to be. So many people fail to even bother to follow through with an idea because they think that failure is almost inevitable. Its really not that hard, you just have to think outside the box. If you have been working in business, chances are you have a pretty good idea of what will work and what wont. Good luck man
I feel where you coming from JT.
I’ve been unemployed for almost a year.This has been my perfect opportunity to brainstorm some new ideas to do my own thing opposed to 9-5.
I made that decision also to leave my last job.Doni regret it?No!
So do your thing.
Nice post man. I know exactly where you’re coming from I’m exactly the same way. I think most people feel this way about work even though they don’t say it. It just keeps getting hammered into our heads as we get older to get a job and work blah blah. Its pretty crazy when you think about it. After I read the 4 hour work week there was no turning back for me. I’m turning 25 tomorrow and I’m on the same path as you trying to design my ideal life. Good luck brother.
“For every Tim Ferris that has succeeded in lifestyle design…” Though I appreciate the inspiration in Ferris’ writing, I think the whole 4 hours per week thing gets misconstrued easily. I’ve found that applying massive action (on the scale of 100 hour “work” weeks) on my own terms is actually pretty fun and invigorating.
Good luck.
Dude, I feel ya. I’m in the same place. Decent-paying job, not too hard or stressful but soul-crushing. I’m handing in my notice next week (but giving my employer 3 months) then I’m moving across the country. Best of luck to you and respect for taking a leap.